GF headed to MBA - making it work?

Your best bet is to propose now and go with her. Otherwise, things will be extraordinarily difficult. If not, think about separating. 

I did long distance for nearly 6 years. It worked out and we are married happily now. If she's the one, she's the one. If she's not, then you'll find out sooner rather than later. 

If you really love her and vice verse, I’m sure you can probably make it work. Just make sure both of you really want to put in the work.

I’ve been married for 6 years and we’ve done long distance for around 4/6. My masters was responsible for a portion of those years, and we survived.

My tips for you:

Have FaceTime / calls as often as you can. We used to have one hour call everyday. Even if I was doing some work at home, we’d chat. If we weren’t able to call, we would just send a note ahead of time, so no one was left waiting.

Communication is obv the most important thing in the beginning and will help you set the tone for your long distance relationship.

And, if possible, buy flights / train tickets ahead of time and make a plan together of who and when is visiting.

Happy to answer any questions and hope you make it work (if that’s really what you want).

Have seen tons of folks make MBAs work with long-distance partners. My advice would be:

• Visit as often as your career and finances allow
• When you do visit, splurge a bit on nice dinners / touristy stuff - make it feel special to her (and you)
• Some MBA social events are set in stone (winter formal, spring social, etc.) while others are spontaneous. You can't plan around the spontaneous ones, but try to visit for the ones you know about in advance. Your partner sounds fun, which means she'll attract fun friends and they'll legitimately want to meet you
• Agree with what CCE said about frequent FaceTimes, perhaps at a set time each week
• If you can, try to attend a signature 1Y trip (either a winter ski trip or spring break to Mexico/Colombia/etc.). That will give you concentrated time with her and her MBA friends, so you'll feel more a part of her life there
• Think about the summer - will she potentially be interning back in your city? Similarly, think about when her recruiting will spike - if she's doing consulting she could be done by ~February and could come back and visit you more often (it doesn't always have to be you going to her, but you might have to shoulder more of the travel load until she gets an offer)
• Minor note, but lots of people will be getting engaged during these two years, so you could start sketching out (in your head) what that would look like for you two - the summer in between 1Y and 2Y isn't a bad time to do it

Speak with her

Not super great advice but my girlfriend and I started doing distance after undergrad. I went to IB and she went across country to medical school. We aren’t in the clear yet, but it has been working well so far. I also had the same insecurities. We see each other about once a month. Wouldnt give up hope my man

Not the same because I'm in undergrad, but my boyfriend from high school and I have been doing long distance for 2.5 of our 4 years now. I'm a strong believer in the idea that distance makes the heart grow fonder. If you can navigate long distance you are truly proving to each other that your relationship is not about the physical, ephemeral things, it's real love. My bf and I call pretty much all the time that we're not at work/school. We have a time difference as well so I sleep before him. I keep him on call while I fall asleep. I think of it as - man, it would be so boring if we dated since high school, went to the same uni, got married. Where's the spice lol. He has different experiences, a different outlook shaped by being in a different country (different continent actually). I get to learn so much more than if he was right here and having the same experience as me. I also think it is such a big solidifying move in a relationship to support your partner to the point of being able to forego the physical with them. Like WOW, you really love and support her enough to do that. Isn't that beautiful? You can do it my friend, but yeah you should figure out if she's the one - if you're still unsure after 3 years, maybe that calls for some introspection. Good luck :)

People don't break up because of distance and life stresses.  They use distance and life stresses as excuses to drop the person they don't want to stay with.

You guys have been together for three years.  At this point, you both know if the other is the one or not.  You're quite obviously into her.  If she's as into you, then there's nothing to worry about except possibly a misunderstanding where she doesn't realize how committed you are.  So make sure she knows and then she either makes it clear that you guys belong together (congrats if so) or she hesitates in which case I wouldn't wait around.

My last relationship ended due to mba and reflecting back on it at this point, the reason was because neither of us had the energy/time to really give the relationship maintenance the investment it needed. I was working until the wee hours consistently. She was a 5 hour plane flight away with a time difference so we talked through how FaceTimes, consistent calls, texting, visits, etc. would be needed to keep going. It just 
 

The lessons I learned in that relationship are now the foundation between my fiancé and I. Not the same situation, but she works a ton as well. Lots of 2-4 am nights for her while I travel half of most months. We communicate consistently and in ways we like to, make time to visit and work remotely to travel with the other as we can. 
 

if the two of you mutually want to invest that effort then I’ve seen it be done more consistently than buzzfeed articles would have you believe. Just takes strong communication and sacrifice. 
 

This is a conversation that you should have with her.
 

Lock it down or move on 

I've seen this work, ie) they got married afterwards, have 2.6 kids, a mortgage, etc.  In more than one case.  So, the odds aren't zero nor do you need it to be the exception to the rule.

That said...

I don't know the ins and outs of EACH case...

But at least in ONE case, she'll never want him to know what she did.  

Put a ring on her finger or break up.

The 2 year MBA timeline is perfect for scheduling a wedding and taking care of a newborn (if that is the plan).

Make sure she doesn't meet Nicholas Latifi

Marry her and move to where she is going. You know what makes marriage work? It's not love, it's not "hard work", it's sacrifice. You give up a little of your dreams and she gives up a little bit of hers and you build a better dream together. 

Do not do long distance. I’m biased but I’ve fucked it up three times and find it a huge waste of time. You have a few options: some combination of getting married and living in the same city. If you love her, be close to her. Even the best relationships become like a chore when she lives in your phone or you need to fly her out to you every few weeks. Totally kills it. This is the fork in the road. Don’t give her up to a LDR if she’s truly the one.

I did 2 years long distance while my GF (now wife) did grad school (5 hour flight away). I feel if you both know and communicate that you want to get married to each other in the future, then a couple years where you see each other every couple months is no big deal. It's a short term thing and as long as you make certain you will live together at the end of it then you both have a 'light at the end of the tunnel' for the long distance. We knew 1:we'll live together afterwards, 2: we want to marry each other, 3: a little time apart is nbd. She'll be busy, you'll be busy, you're both adults, just work with it.

If you think she's gonna break up with you (could happen even if she didn't go long distance), she hopefully wont wait 2 years of long distance to break it off afterwards. Make sure you she doesn't have soothsayers telling her dumb FUD and be completely transparent with your future plans together and if you have concerns, air them. I told my wife i'll move to whatever city she gets a job at since I had the option to WFH (pre-covid) and my wife's mom thought I may leave her after 2 years of long distance because I wouldn't want to move... who stays practically celibate for 2 years just to break it off at the end??? I wouldn't worry about 'competition' in terms of potential 'dating options' she may have. If she's willing to dump you for someone new then it doesn't matter if she moves away or not. If she's rational and if willing to leave you, she'll dump you immediately and you wont waste 2 years of celibacy. 

In my case, I trusted my wife, my wife trusted me, and we lived happily ever after. Hope whatever you choose works out for you. 

Look, the long and short of it is, there is no clear answer. I have seen engaged couples break up within weeks of the MBA start. I've seen couples who did long distance for years stay loyal during the MBA and then get engaged or married afterwards.

The MBA, and the structure of the program (lots of drunken parties + elaborate trips abroad, smart / driven people, etc.) has the potential to add a lot of temptation for people, especially if couples are apart. I think the best situations were when the partners came with the MBA student, so that they could integrate more into the spousal community - for some, the spouse was more popular and was organizing more events than the MBA student!

You need to have a serious plan and conversation with your partner and confirm you are both on the same page, but also be open to the prospect that her entire perspective might change after the program and if that happens, then it was always meant to happen.

3 years is enough to know whether she is suitable to be a life partner or not. You've been with her for 3 years, you love her, yet your sentences are filled with  phrases that convey uncertainty. I feel like you don't really know what you want. 

You need to figure out what you want exactly before making any decision.

By the way, you said explicitly you are feeling insecure. Although I'm pretty young, personal experiences have taught me that insecurity and weakness on the man's side will always kill the relationship.

MS me all you want, but if you live in NYC and have been dating for 3 years and she chooses Wharton over Columbia, she might not think you're the one...