How to overcome Sexual Attraction to PJT?
Hey guys, incoming PJT intern here (as you all know) and just wanted to get some advice from you all. Naturally, when preparing to submit my application and writing my cover letter I ended up doing some pretty deep research into the firm and all its accolades. As any top candidate would do, I used wallstreetoasis.com forums as my sole source of information. Stumbling Across one thread in particular by a reputable investment banking vice president who goes by the prestigious pseudonym LowCaliberTalent, my eyes were opened. T'was the day I found out that PJT is the absolute upper echelon of banking, or as the demigod LowCaliberTalent would say, the Mount Olympus in the banking domain! No name Peasant Pedestrian Commoner banks (PPC'S) like Goldman Sachs, Evercore Et al. weren't even within a reasonable Mahalanobi distance to the top tier of BSD banking, the real masters of the universe. Enlightened, I dove deeper into decade-old forums, eventually stumbling onto the Blackstone origins of this holy firm. As I read this, with my Johnson uncontrollably erecting, I couldn't do anything other than simulate the updating of my LinkedIn to inform my inferior Plebeian Network of the Celestial firm I will be interning with.
''Incoming Summer Analyst at PJT Partners (Formally Blackstone M&A Advisory (Current CEO Paul Tubman - EX Head of MS(PPC Bank) ISG))'
Fortunately, my countless weeks of consistent 15.5 hour days on wso (30 minutes dedicated to 'massaging' my Johnson over pictures of PJT RX Deal Tombstones (I snuck into the offices at 5am)), creating IB tier lists (PJT tier 1 of course), heckling the unknowledgeable verified IB directors who dare put GS above PJT for exits(In a European forum) and Colluding with my fellow 'Intern in IB - Restr' to spread our justifiable pjt propaganda had paid off. I had finally landed the holy grail of summer internships. I can now say I am an 'Incoming Summer Analyst at PJT Partners (Formally Blackstone M&A Advisory (Current CEO Paul Tubman - EX Head of MS(PPC Bank) ISG)).
Admittedly, once I received the call notifying me of the life-changing news, I ejaculated. Can you blame me? This is the equivalent of laying the pipe down on the hot girl next door. Think about it. Incredibly sexy face (PJT RX) with a great but not phenomenal body (PJT M&A) but who even wants the chick with the unreal body, the natural ones are who we want to marry.
There is only one issue now. Whenever I browse WSO, any mention of the word 'PJT' has the same effect on me as Bull Viagra. My Johnson has been throbbing for the entire 30 minutes I have taken to write this and I have already taken 3 'massage breaks' to try and offset this but it's just not working.
Any advice guys?
What 0 pussy does to an LSE first year student
Girls have cooties anyways, you keep them! I, on the other hand, will stick to my coveted PJT deal toys.
GOLDMAN....that should soften you up a bit
Thanks, visualising the non-target commoner backgrounds of their analysts helped a bit.
I hear A2A promotions are determined by how much material they scrape from under your desk at the two year mark
PJT hasn't even been an EB since like 2015 lmao. JEF, Moelis, etc. all better.
How will this affect LeBron's legacy?
Est iusto rerum at beatae iusto enim. Et harum officia sequi unde similique. Non nemo in provident vel recusandae deleniti sint.
Quia tenetur corporis qui exercitationem labore. Rem atque suscipit quis sed quia alias et asperiores.
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